Chatbots and Kids: What Parents Need to Know Now

Here's how to talk to your child about AI, starting in preschool. A free downloadable Parent Guide with tips and conversation starters is included.

Chatbots are computer programs that use AI to tell stories, offer advice, provide information, or chat with you using text, voice, or video. Popular tools include ChatGPT, Snap's My AI, Replika, and Google's new chatbot for kids under 13 called Gemini. These tools are increasingly being integrated into apps, games, and websites that kids use every day. A harbinger of things to come, Mattel and OpenAI announced a partnership, suggesting that soon Barbie will have a lot to say. I wrote about why chatbots are so appealing to kids in a recent post Kids and Chatbots: When AI Feels Like A New Best Friend and Diana Graber and I tackled it in our recent Cyberwise Chat. The link to the video/podcast is here and I am sharing the downloadable Parent Guide that I made to accompany our chat. See below.

This is just the beginning of the chatbot story, as the availability and sophistication of generative AI tools increase constantly. We waited too long to prepare our kids for social media. Let’s not make the same mistake again. Chatbots can influence how children learn, socialize, and view the world. While some are educational and support creativity, others can give misleading or just plain wrong information, but their human-like communication patterns blur the line between human and machine, and their responsiveness and the sheer volume of information make AI tools seem like authorities and trusted friends.

We all have the tendency to anthropomorphize--attribute human traits, emotions, and intentions to non-human entities. We do it to cars, toasters, and computers—and they don’t engage us in conversation. This is a natural response, driven by our reliance on social cognition and pattern-seeking as part of our survival instinct.

For kids, however, the ability to tell reality from fantasy develops sometime early to middle childhood. This tendency toward magical thinking is why reinforcing chatbots as tools and not people is critical from the start. Even once kids reach middle childhood or beyond, they are not immune to developing an emotional attachment to chatbots. Emotional regulation and critical thinking continue to develop. The prefrontal cortex is not fully mature until the mid-20s. When a chatbot responds as if it were a friend, the effect of being 'seen and heard' is powerful, making kids vulnerable to developing emotional attachments.

Understanding how these bots work—and having open conversations about their benefits and risks—can help kids use them safely and responsibly. The downloadable Parent Guide summarizes some of the main facts into tables and provides ideas for getting the conversation started with your kids, no matter what their age.

Handout Contents

Parents’ most asked questions and worries about chatbots and kids

• Are there different types of chatbots?
• What are the pros & cons of different chatbots?
• How much do I need to supervise my child's chatbot use?
• When should kids be taught digital literacy?
• What can parents do now?
• What Red Flags should I watch for?

How to talk to kids about chatbots by developmental stage

• Early childhood
• Middle childhood
• Early adolescence
• Adolescence

Bottom Line: Talk Early and Often

AI interactivity—whether chatbots or behind the scenes—is here to stay. The goal isn't to shut it out but to help kids recognize it and make sense of it. Chatbots may talk like friends, but they aren't human. They don't replace the need for real connection. The most powerful thing a parent can do is have open conversations that build a foundation of trust so that the parent becomes the go-to source for questions and issues. With age-appropriate boundaries, respect, and curiosity, families can turn chatbot use into an opportunity for learning and growth.

The downloadable Parent Guide that summarizes some of the main ideas into tables and has ideas for getting the conversation started with your kids no matter what their age.

See https://www.cyberwise.org/chatbots to watch the video.